Conversations with Critters
Walk with the animals. Talk with the animals. And the highly anticipated release of Chapter 8! The Case of The Misplaced Priority Envelope continues to unfold…
Today, Critters, we are pleased to present Chapter 8 of The Case of The Misplaced Priority Envelope! Last week, we left off with light at the end of the tunnel for the Critters in Chapter 7. Our detectives, Jasper Kitten, Chris and Star discovered a secret deep deep within the shadowy depths beneath the streets of San Francisco. Not a bad turn of mysterious events after falling through a trap door. Gosh.
Please, welcome our Core Community Cats, Jasper Kitten and Chris, for their introductory excellent detective critter commentary!
Jasper: Hello, Critters! Thank you for joining us for Chapter 8! Are you ready?
Chris: Get set, Critters! Thank you very much for staying tuned as the mystery continues to unfold!
Jasper: Go!
The Case of The Misplaced Priority Envelope
Book 1 from the J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency
By,
Jasper Kitten, Chris and Star in Heaven Furever and Ever
Dedicated in luvluvluving memory of Star
Chapter 8
The Sidewalk Crittercafe
Together, the Critters came to the end of the tunnel. A narrow opening, a foot below ground level, led to the sidewalk. Jasper Kitten scrambled out first and turned around. He reached a white gloved paw toward Clementine, still riding on her father’s shoulders.
“Clementine, please take Jasper Kitten’s paw,” said Cecil.
She reached for Jasper Kitten and he drew her out of the tunnel. In the brand new light of day, Cecil, then Star and then Chris all climbed out and the Critters began the long walk back to the Earthquake Shack.
Jasper Kitten pulled off the headlamp and ran a paw through his orange stripes. He watched the sunrise over the East Bay Hills, the fog still hovering over the water.
Clementine, riding on Cecil’s shoulders again, began to mew as they approached a Sidewalk Crittercafe. The aroma of breakfast kibble overwhelmed her.
”I’m very very hungry,” she cried.
”Of course, Clementine, of course,” said Cecil, reaching up to soothe her.
Jasper Kitten led the group to a table and they took their seats. The street began to thrum with the morning commute. The clatter of dishes in the cafe and Clementine’s mewing kept beat with each other, a percussive force while Chris turned on his phone and tapped his toebeans in rhythm on the screen.
”Our reserves for our spending account under the meals category are quite good,” he said.
They ordered steaming mugs of tea and bowls of kibble, plus the morning special sourdough biscuits.
”Gosh, this sure is a San Francisco treat,” said Star, crunching on a biscuit.
“Clementine, please eat slowly or you will upset your digestion,” Cecil cautioned his ravenous furbaby.
”Yes, Daddy,” she said.
”Gosh, what kind of rodents are those?” asked Star, gazing at a newly seated group. “Please, google their species specific identification, Chris.”
Chris tapped at his phone screen.
”My friends,” he said, “they are a group of Degus.”
”Degus?” asked Jasper Kitten, turning his instinctive focus to Chris and his findings.
”Correct, Jasper Kitten,” replied Chris. “Furthermore, they are a small hystricomorpha rodent endemic to the Chilean matorral ecoregion of central Chili.”
”San Francisco certainly is a world class city. Critters come to San Francisco from all over the globe,” said Star, sipping her tea.
“Yes, that’s a good point, Star, a very good point,” said Jasper Kitten, his voice trailing off.
”Gosh, one of the Critters in their group is wearing a captain’s hat and she looks a little different from the Degus,” said Star, with a subtle move of her cinnamon brown paw lest she appear to point in the group’s direction.
Jasper Kitten sat with his cafe spoon suspended over his breakfast bowl.
Chris tapped at his phone again, searching, searching.
”Star, you have made an important finding,” said Chris. “Degus have, in fact, co-evolved with Kangaroo Rats. Clearly, they share an ancestral genealogy in common with each other as well as sharing a Sidewalk Crittercafe morning meal. Fascinating stuff.”
“Gosh, you mean they’re like cousins?” asked Star.
”It sure looks like it,” replied Chris.
”As opposed to diverse species like dogs and cats?”
”Yup.”
”Gosh, Chris, do you think they get along as well as we do even though they’re closely related and we’re not?”
”It does look like they are rather enjoying each other’s company,” said Chris.
”But what about that captain’s hat? I’m flummoxed about that, Chris.”
”Maybe it’s from one of the souvenir shops in the City,” Chris speculated.
Jasper Kitten dropped his spoon into his bowl and hopped down from his cafe chair.
”Jasper Kitten, where are you going?” cried Chris and Star.
”That captain’s hat,” stated Jasper Kitten, “is quite the opposite of a souvenir. Observe the nautical insignia, the indelible iconic symbol of the TransPacific Cruise Line. Furthermore, this Officer has four stripes on her wrists and epaulets.”
Chris and Star counted to four and then locked eyes with Jasper Kitten.
“We are in the presence of a Captain with a capital C,” confirmed Jasper Kitten.
Chris and Star clutched their spoons.
Jasper Kitten sidled up to the group as the Degus, sharing a variety of leafy greens, burst into a round of raucous laughter.
”Pardon me, Capt. Kangaroo Rat,” said Jasper Kitten with all due respect.
”Yes, may I help you?” she replied, peering up at him from her captain’s cafe chair.
”Please, allow me to introduce myself. My name is Jasper Kitten of the J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency.”
“Your name is legendary both on land and on the high seas, J Kitten. I am honored to meet you.”
She tipped her hat and extended a paw to Jasper Kitten.
The Degus quieted down and shifted in their cafe chairs, alert to the presence of Jasper Kitten. They remained riveted on him, but also glanced at the Critters seated nearby.
”Gosh, Chris, Cecil and Clementine,” said Star. “It sure does look like Jasper Kitten is on to something.” They continued eating, ever watchful of the conversation unfolding nearby.
”Capt. Kangaroo Rat,” Jasper Kitten went on, “I couldn’t help but overhear you say that you were down at the docks.”
”Yes, absolutely, Jasper Kitten. We came through the Golden Gate and into port this morning. That fog can be a challenge to navigate.”
“It can indeed,” he agreed. “My understanding is that recent activity of a suspicious nefarious nature has taken place on the docks. Any information that you may have observed would be most appreciated.”
”Yes, Jasper Kitten, I’d be chuffed to help you and your detective agency in any way that I can be of service. Unfortunately, the docks were deserted this morning when we arrived.”
”I see,” he replied. “Thank you. Thank you very much.”
”You’re welcome! Is there anything else that you would like to know?”
”If you wouldn’t mind, what route brought you to San Francisco?”
”We are traveling due North on the Cross Continental Culinary Circuit. We started in Chili, in South America, and are headed all the way to Canada, in North America.”
”That is most helpful.”
”We’re on a tour of Lettuces of the Americas,” she further offered. “The Salad Bar here at this top rated Sidewalk Crittercafe is our first stop in San Francisco.”
”You have been most helpful. My colleagues and I certainly hope that you will enjoy your stay.”
Chris and Star gave a brief wave. Chris flagged a waiter and sent a complimentary tray of sourdough biscuits to the Captain.
“That is truly kind of you. These sourdough biscuits have a five star culinary rating. They are most excellent and baked here on site,” she said, gnawing on a morsel. “Well worth the trip.”
”Yes, we happened upon this Sidewalk Crittercafe a little while ago. It is most satisfying.”
”Indeed,” she said.
”Capt. Kangaroo Rat, may I ask if you have seen any critters on your travels who resemble our Serval friends here?”
The Captain studied Cecil and Clementine as they continued to chow down.
”There’s something about the Big Cat’s eyes. Yes. That color of green is most distinctive, but I can’t quite place it either.” She shrugged. “I’m sorry, Jasper Kitten, I do so wish I could be of more help.”
”You’ve been a great deal of help already,” he complimented her.
”On behalf of the Degus and the entire TransPacific Cruise Line, we wish you safe travels and good luck cracking the case.”
”Thank you, Capt. Thank you very much.”
Jasper Kitten bowed his head to the Captain and walked toward the Critters.
”Jasper Kitten,” she called after him.
He paused and faced her.
”Come to think of it, when we charted our course through the Golden Gate, a small craft came a little too close for comfort.”
”I see,” said Jasper Kitten. “Would you characterize this as a near miss out of a technical lack of navigational skill in the fog or was it perhaps, shall we say, something more reckless?”
”Due to the low visibility, I’d say it was, at the very least, a lack of navigational skill. I made an incident report to the Port Authority. Perhaps you could check with the Agency. They might be able to tell you more about the vessel.”
”Yes, that is excellent advice. Do you happen to recall what direction they were headed?”
”Toward the Bay.”
“Thank you, Capt. Kangaroo Rat.”
Jasper Kitten took his seat at the table. Clementine and Cecil continued to eat. Chris tapped on his phone to pay the bill through their digital wallet and Star gazed into the distance with a deep, deep sigh.
“Is something on your mind, Star?” inquired Jasper Kitten.
”There is something, but it is not on my mind. It is on the tip of my tongue,” she replied with her can do Chihuahua attitude. “The Degus and their co-evolution with Kangaroo Rats.”
”What about them?” prompted Jasper Kitten.
”Gosh. Well. I seem to remember something in the Treatise on Animal Magnetism elucidating and pontificating on a diversity of species and migratory patterns.”
”I see,” said Jasper Kitten, intrigued. “I seem to recall that section as well, although it was not species specific.”
”Correct, Jasper Kitten. Gosh, when we get back to the Earthquake Shack, I’ll have to review this topic theoretically, at the very least. I recall two sections. One on similarity. One on diversity.”
”Good thinking, Star. I brought a backup pair of reading glasses for you in the attaché case of evidence, so you can get right to work.”
”Excellent. Thank you, Jasper Kitten. Thank you very much,” she said, the light flashing in her eyes.
They left the cafe, a doggy bag of sourdough biscuits tucked under Star’s arm. Wisps of fog began to evaporate off the water, steaming toward the sun, and they covered the distance toward home.
Chris stopped as a ping went off on his phone.
“Critters,” he said, his voice grim and growling low and slow. “A text has come in. And…”
”Is it…,” said Star.
”You mean…,” said Jasper Kitten.
”Yes. It’s a Haiku. Another one!”
”We have nothing to fear,” said Jasper Kitten, swatting the air with a white gloved paw. “Read it outloud, Chris. Please. Proceed.”
”There was no reward
And yet there is no ransom
Cats don’t like water.”
Chris held the phone up for all to see. The Critters swallowed hard. Clementine burrowed into Cecil’s fur while his green eyes began to tear.
“Why. I. Will. Tear. This. Perp. Apart,” said Chris and pressed a toe bean into the phone.
Eager to return to the Earthquake Shack, they walked on, picking up their pace with the cottage coming into view. Water lapped with increasing waves along the dock, a light spray covering the sidewalk. A boat emerged from the fog, traveling toward the Golden Gate and open waters.
Over the churn of the motor and over the chop of the wake, the Critters were all ears as they heard a distinct and distressed mewing again, only this time, only now it rose in pitch to a keening wail that pierced the air and floated and faded away.
🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾
Poetry with Pets
Sample leafy greens
A Captain of the high seas
What rhymes with Orange?
By Jasper Kitten, Chris and Star in Heaven Furever and Ever
Critters, you can catch up on all the adventures with the following links!
The Case of The Misplaced Priority Envelope!
Chapters 1 through 7 brought to you by the J Kitten, Sleuth & Purveyor of Bright Shiny Objects Detective Agency!
A couple of thoughts from Arya and I. We notice the mutual aide among different species and the mutual respect accorded the various non-human animals (yes, this is a story about critters, yet still I thought it important to mention. Well, actually Arya did).
And second that mewing is likely from another serval who has been catnapped by what seems a nefarious criminal ring. Arya and I are in suspense here, Heidi.
Excellent chapter Heidi! I like the interesting turn of events with the Capt. Kangaroo Rat. More clues to follow and looking forward to the next chapter 9.
PS - I loved the reference to the San Francisco treat - the second after I read that phrase, the old Rice-a-Roni jingle played in my head. Haha.